Just for fun... and cause I like surveys :)

So... this brings me back to high school when I would do these all the time... or maybe even college? hahah... I figure this is a safe, not annoying place to fill one out... yay for mind-numbing activities...

ARE YOU:
1. A Cuddler? hi? yes... :) I LOVE cuddling
2. A morning person? OMG NO
3. Are you a perfectionist? definitely...
4. An only child? nope - two incredible brothers who mean the world to me
5. Catholic? respect it... but I wouldn't classify myself as such
6. In your pajamas? nope
8. Okay styling other people's hair? not really... that reminds me of doing Holly's hair that one time... heehee ;)
9. Left handed? nope
11. Shy around the opposite gender? depends

DO YOU:
12. Bite your nails? sometimes - if they're uneven
13. Get paranoid at times? yup
14. Regret something that you have said? yes...
15. Curse frequently when you get mad? maybe for like 5 minutes... :)
16. Enjoy country music? yes!
17. Enjoy jazz music? yes - but only live
18. Enjoy smoothies? Yum
19. Enjoy talking on the phone? Depends on who I’m talking to
20. Have a lot to learn? you have no idea... I feel so behind in life's wisdom :)
21. Have a pet? nope
23. Have all your grandparents? no... only my darling grandmother. my incredible grandpa died in February of this year...
25. Have been told that you are smart? yes... my mama tells me so :)
26. Have a broken bone? hairline fracture once
27. Have Caller I.D. on your phone? good gracious, yes - and no, I don't answer calls from people I don't know

HAVE YOU:
28. Have you ever changed a diaper? Yup
29. Changed a lot over the past year? more than I could have dreamed
30. Have friends seen your natural hair color? almost always
33. Had your hair cut within the last week? one week exactly
34. Had the cops called on you? no gracias

LAST PERSON WHO:
2. Saw you cry? Chrystal and Paul...
3. You went to the movies with? JP
4. You went to the mall with? Myself
5. You went to dinner with? JP
6. You talked to on the phone/texted? Angie
7. Said 'I love you' to you and really meant it? Angie
9. Made you laugh? myself... trying to parallel park

WOULD YOU RATHER?
1. Pierce your nose or tongue? nose, silly, can't you see? You can get paralyzed from a tongue piercing
3. Drink whole or skim milk? 1%
4. Die in a fire or drown? float up to heaven?
5. Spend time with your parents or enemies? Parents

ARE YOU:
1. Simple or complicated? Complicated - but simple to most people
2. Gay? Nope
3. Hardcore? definitely not

DO YOU PREFER:
1. Flowers or candy? Flowers
2. Gray or black? Black
3. Color or Black and white photos? Depends
4. Lust or love? Lust is worthless without love
5. Sunrise or sunset? Sunset
8. Staying up late or waking up early? Staying up late

DO YOU PREFER:
1. Sun or moon? Sun
2. Winter or Fall? Fall
3. Left or right? Right
4. 10 acquaintances or having two best friends? Best friends
5. Sun or rain? Sun mostly but I like rain sometimes too
6. Vanilla ice cream or chocolate ice cream? Chocolate

ABOUT YOU!
1. What time is it? 6:09pm
2. Name? Vanessa... it means butterfly in greek... which is why my parents gave me that name
3. Nickname(s): Veebs, V, Vaness, Vane, Ness, Nessa, Cheeks, Missi, Sunshine
4. Where were you born? San Diego, CA
5. What is your birthdate? May 21st
6. What do you want? everyone in the world to have water, food, shelter, and love
7. Where do you want to live? with people I love
8. How many kids do you want? lots of adopted ones... lots of latin ones :)
9. What would you want to name a girl? something special
10. What would you want to name a boy? ""
11. You want to get married? someday...

UNIQUE!
1. Nervous Habits: biting my lip or clicking my nails
2. Are you double jointed? ?? don't think so
3. Can you roll your tongue? yup
4. Can you raise one eyebrow? yup... oh so well ;)
5. Can you cross your eyes? Yup
6. Do you make your bed daily? Never
7. Which shoe goes on first? whichever one I find first :)
8. Ever thrown one at someone? duh
9. On the average, how much money do you carry with you? $5-20
10. What jewelry do you wear? earrings... sometimes necklaces...

IN THE LAST MONTH, HAVE YOU? (YES OR NO)
Had a b/f or g/f? nope
Sang in front of people: nope... but I did sing the whole Selah album by myself in my living room :)
Been kissed: lots... I have sweet friends :)
Been hugged: even more
Felt stupid: often
Missed someone: yup
Got drunk: nope... but slightly tipsy the other night... note to self... freaking eat before you drink! ;)
Got high: no gracias
Danced Crazy: just salsa and swing
Cried: too much
Lied: maybe? can't remember...

Q: Last thing you ate:
A: cereal... yes... I'm obsessed

Q: Do you have anything bothering you?:
A: who doesn't? bothering is part of life...

Q: What's annoying you right now?:
A: not being in control :)

Q: Is there a person who is on your mind right now:
A: no not really

Q: Where is the last place you went?
A: work

Q: Do you look like your mom or dad?:
A: everyone says I look like my mom :)

Q: Do you smile often?:
A: yes... I love smiling... it's a little way to tell someone "I love you because you are beloved" :)

Q: Do you think that a person is thinking of you?
A: ? maybe?

Q: Do you wish upon stars?
A: nope

Q: Are you a friendly person?:
A: depends... but yes, mostly :)

Q: What color shirt are you wearing?
A: brown

Q: What were you doing at 12 last night?:
A: sleeping! I have to get up early!

Q: When is the last time you saw your dad?:
A: for my grandma's birthday? has it been that long?? ayayay... I miss my daddy

Q: Do you have any pets?
A: nope

Q: Do you get angry easily?
A: depends... anger is not an emotion I allow myself to feel much anymore... frustrated... annoyed... sad... but not angry. Why does that seem like such a scary word?

Q: What was your last thought before you went to sleep last night?
A: "Where do I place my identity? Is it in God?" Last night was a thinking night...

Q: Take any vitamins?
A: blech - my mom takes enough for the whole family ;)

Q: What are you about to do?
A: go play nertz!

Q: Do you ever check your phone waiting for someone to call?
A: all the time... I'm a nerd like that

Q: Rate life as of right now 1-10.
A: 8 - I like where I am right now... I feel like I'm "becoming" and I like it :)

Hard decisions...

I just read this in the news this morning... Check it out:

Immigration raids make a ghost town in Georgia

It's hard to know how to feel. My immediate reaction is, "why all the fuss over getting people out? I know there are problems... But our policies (from what I understand) make it extremely difficult to get here legally anyways...

Here's what stood out to me:

At Sucursal Salina No. 2, a store stocked with Mexican fruit sodas and snacks, cashier Alberto Gonzalez said Wednesday that the owner may shutter the place. By midday, Gonzalez has had only six customers. Normally, he would see 100.

The B&S convenience store, owned by Keith and Regan Slater, the mayor's son and grandson, has lost about 80 percent of its business.

"These people come over here to make a better way of life, not to blow us up," complained Keith Slater, who keeps a portrait of Ronald Reagan on the wall. "I'm a die-hard Republican, but I think we missed the boat with this one."

Since the mid-1990s, Stillmore has grown dependent on the paychecks of Mexican workers who originally came for seasonal farm labor, picking the area's famous Vidalia onions. Many then took year-round jobs at the Crider plant, with a workforce of about 900.

Crider President David Purtle said the agents began inspecting the company's employment records in May. They found 700 suspected illegal immigrants, and supervisors handed out letters over the summer ordering them to prove they came to the U.S. legally or be fired. Only about 100 kept their jobs.

The arrests started at the plant September 1. During the Labor Day weekend, agents with guns and bulletproof vests converged on workers' homes after getting the addresses from Crider's files.

So... devastating the town's economy for many... and then the flip side:

The poultry plant has limped along with half its normal workforce. Crider increased its starting wages by $1 an hour to help recruit new workers.

Stacie Bell, 23, started work canning chicken at Crider a week ago. She said the pay, $7.75 an hour, led her to leave her $5.60-an-hour job as a Wal-Mart cashier in nearby Statesboro. Still, Bell said she felt bad about the raids.

Thoughts?

i heart disneyland

So... I got a new season pass to Disneyland a few weeks ago... and we've already gone 3 times! ;) Good times, good times. Here are some super fun pics... I love being there - it really is a magical world. Especially when you can go on a few rides, decide you're tired and drive 15 minutes to get home. :) heehee I'm still torn between enjoying life and not wasting time on frivolous things... but this is my frivolous thing for the moment, I suppose...

The first day I went to get my pass with Dee and Chrystal...





The next Sunday, Dee and I went to California Adventure which was simply beautiful. :)






We went on a ride called "Soaring" that lifted you up as if you were flying all over CA, showing different important sites along the way - from Yosemite to the Golden Gate bridge to downtown L.A. to the mojave desert... it was incredible. Outside of the ride were these misters that you could cool down in... SO fun. :)



We went on this roller coaster twice - once on the front and once in the back. I was definitely pretty nautious after the time in the front... good Lord. :)




All about the botox... we thought we looked pretty sexy with our "bug eyes" on for the Bug's Life Show, so we took a botox picture. It's becoming a pose of choice, I believe. :)




And then for Labor day, Pablito, Chrystal and I went with some of their work friends to Disneyland/CA Adventure... it was hot but really fun. :)

Where your treasure is, there your heart will be also...

I'm reading another book, concurrently, called "The Fight in the Fields: Cesar Chavez and the Farmworkers Movement" by Susan Ferriss and Ricardo Sandoval. My awesome mom bought it for me a while ago and I finally got back to reading it... Here are some quotes...

"It's better to die on our feet than live on our knees"

- Epifanio Camacho

"As the sun rose over the Sierra Nevada to the east, strikers took up their positions at each of the ranch's twenty entrances... Suddenly, a blast of engines from an empty field behind the pickets silenced the crowd. Two men poised atop tractors jerked their machines into gear and began lumbering toward the pickets, dragging sharp-edged plow disks behind them. Bearing down as if they were driving tanks into battle, they drove within a few feet of the strikers, churning up choking clouds of powdery dust. The pickets and Bishop Sumner were soon covered in grit. But the Schenley foremen didn't stop. They seemed to relish this mission, driving back and forth continuously, showering the crowd with fine Delano dirt. Finally, after watching the spectacle from a distance, the grape pickers who'd crossed the picket line were so disgusted they, too, decided to leave the field. 'After almost an hour, when we are unrecognizable with dust, and our throats are hoarse with yelling and choking, we see the thrilling sight of a worker's car heading toward us through the vines,' recalls union volunteer Eugene Nelson... 'Their admiring looks seem to say: After seeing what you went through, your persistence in the face of all that, it was impossible not to join you.'

"Some of the growers tried to appel to pickets' sense of loyalty. 'They were like members of our family. We gave them a place to live all year long,' one grower said of his Filipino workers. His kinship apparently had its limits. When pickets suggested to him that he could have averted the strike with a twenty-cent raise, the man grew angry. 'We'll let the grapes rot first,' he snapped..."

"The Dispoto brothers sprayed pickets with pesticides, threatened them with dogs, and showered them with obscenities... Other ranchers sometimes tested strikers by walking up to picket lines and stomping on toes, punching men in the ribs, and issuing racist taunts..."

I can't even begin to imagine... they sacrificed their safety, their security because they saw beyond their small circumstances to a bigger vision of freedom. Granted, there are serious issues in the U.S. with workers today (as well as around the world), but how amazing to see people fight for truly good causes. Their courage boggles my mind... Why don't we learn about this in school? I'll post an incredible story of love later... no time now...

Why?

I have so many things that I would like to ask God "why?" about. So many. There are things in life - both in my personal life and the lives of others that I can see a purpose for. Understanding that purpose helps me to justify certain things. Everything from "Why are there ants?" (Because I have yet to see a genuine purpose for them... other than teaching us patience) to "Why is there poverty in America?" (Because even with everyone's musings, there's no rational reason kids should be hungry or that HMO healthcare should be so shitty). There are so many things that I don't understand - I guess if I could see the bigger picture, like I feel God must see, it would be much easier to keep my head on straight.

Sometimes, I can look back on my life and see how certain things led to others that led to others that led to others that carried me to where I am now. Then it makes sense. I know there are things right now that I don't understand and will look back on my life and see why certain things happened or why I am at this very moment in my current position in life - job, friends, family, circumstances, location, etc. Right now I can't see that, though... and it's somewhat difficult to persevere amidst frustrations.

I just wonder how much of our lives are determined by what we choose to subject ourselves to/how we choose to live our lives, and what are merely circumstances. Are we really as in control as we think we are in the States? Or just the people with good circumstances?

We lived such charmed lives... I can't get over it. This weekend was so filled with incredibly fun things... I don't remember when I had so much fun in such a short time. :) Friday night I went swing dancing and had an AMAZING time... sweaty and all... :) but had good friends, good talks, good dancing and it was just fantastic. Saturday I slept in, did some errands, bought "The Working Poor: Invisible in America" by David Shipler (confirming my hatred for Wal-mart), watched a movie, and hung out with a really good friend. Sunday I slept in... again... did laundry... showing me I have way too many things to wash... read more of my book, relaxed on the couch in my air-conditioned apartment, played cards with my roomates and my pseudo-roomate (pablito) and had good, philosophical, affirming talks... Today I went to Disneyland and CA adventure all morning/afternoon... came home and slept... went to the Walkers to play Nertz and have a good time... and tommorrow I will ride my bike to my work where I get enough money to pay my bills and have fun... because I was given the gift of an education... because my parents were willing to help me through college... because they loved me and wanted what was best for me and never intentionally hurt me... I did well in school because I had strong friendships, great professors/teachers, encouraging choral experience... My life has been so charmed... so different than the majority of the world. I am so spoiled...

Though I have made some choices... I feel like my life is the result of so many other things outside of my control. I was not abused as a child - physically, sexually or emotionally. I was never hungry as a child. I was often told how loved I was by dozens of loving friends/family around me - and still am. I played sports whenever I could - none of my limbs were deformed or missing. I have known colors all my life - my eyes (aside from being somewhat nearsighted) are just fine. I am often healthy and rarely sick. Even when I get sick, there are loving people to take care of me. My family (aside from my darling grandfather and those I never really knew) is entirely living. I never worried about them being knifed or shot at. I never worried about our house being bombed. I never worried about being raped by a father who had AIDS. I honestly never worried about anything worth worrying about...

By the time I graduated college, I had traveled to 5 countries outside of the U.S. and 9 states within the U.S. I have white-water rafted, zip-lined through the rainforest, swum in the Caribbean Sea, kayaked, night-snorkeled, day-snorkeled, competed in choir festivals, hiked in the Grand Canyon, toured our nation's capital twice, built 6 different houses in Mexico with my church, learned another language, taught ESL classes, gone to theme parks since I was little... honestly.

I could sit here for longer typing, but generally, I am simply mystified at the wealthy, luxurious, easy life I have lived. Somewhat ashamed... I feel such a heavy burden to do more with my life. My miniscule problems and frustrations are nothing compared to those that people face everyday. We live in such a materialistic world, and I can't seem to get away from it. I am a sucker in it...

So, really... when it comes down to it, although I have so many "whys?" to ask God, I have no right to question. No right to be upset about my life and my petty problems. My only purpose at this point should be to love and serve - my life has been ridiculously full of too much good for me to ever complain about the bad. Not to ignore the hurt, but rather to put everything in perspective. To see the world we live in and treasure the special moments there are - to count every blessing and realize that every trial is overshadowed in my life by blessing.

Thank you, God. I have never understood why my life is so charmed. But I pray I am only a vessel to spread that charm to each person I contact. I pray that my life makes an impression on each soul and that their life is touched by your love.

Chrystal's 22nd Birthday... :)

So... the day after Jess and Olivia's wedding, our darling girl turned 22! Good times... We went to the cheesecake factory to celebrate - we were still quite tired from the wedding... and slightly ridiculous. :) heehee I love my friends... *sigh. It's amazing to find those people that you can just "be" with and know that they'll always love you and encourage you... no matter how silly you get.